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RHOD Season 4 Episode 11

We continue the journey with the housewives into a “midlife crisis” birthday party for Travis. It’s a perfect time for reflecting on life backward in order to affect life forward. Birthdays are also a time to laugh and enjoy the friendships that surround us. The fun and friendship included Travis being crowned as King. The frivolity was just beginning, and so were the personal reflective insights. Yet, friendships are a part of every celebration. Friendship should be supportive of where you are and how you are feeling.

As Stephanie is planning the party, she hears about Kameron not believing in their friendship. It causes Stephanie to struggle with hearing the continued drama around the situation. She shares her feelings with her mom and the difficulties around the interactions she has with Kameron. When experiences trigger us to go to the deep dark place of negative emotions and hurt, is it for healing or to release pain we hold onto tightly, sometimes without even knowing.

This situation leads us to look at the question, “What is a friend?” How do you define friendship in your life? Should manipulation be a part of the relationship in any way? Should we be a friend with the rules? Boundaries are appropriate with respectful expectations. Seeing ourselves in our own truth is what matters—and valuing the other person by focusing on their best version of themselves.

As we saw in this episode, Stephanie shared how she has struggled with feeling not worthy and not good enough. She realizes how Kameron brings out her insecurity for not fitting in or not feeling valued. Stephanie avoided or apologized for her own behavior and only did things to make Kameron happy.

Yes, how we see ourselves is what matters.

Stephanie experiences a moment with her mom that involved being open and vulnerable in her own insight. For most of her life, she has been a person that seeks “peace over resolution” and has carried the deeper feeling of unworthiness. Now, she can own that affirmation of I AM ENOUGH! She has worked hard to feel this statement in her mind, body, and spirit. Owning who we are and bringing the best out in others is a lesson for each of us that we can live out in the steps of our lives every day. It is a lifelong lesson, one we learn over and over again.

What about you? Are you a “people pleaser”? Avoidance, non-confrontational, going with the flow of what others want because it's more important than you want? Are you able to own who you are? What characteristics are representative in your core and visible to others? When we are not ourselves in an authentic way, we can experience depression and anxiety. Does the affirmation and statement of I AM ENOUGH resonate with you? Many of the women I coach and speak for consistently resonate with feeling unworthy or being in situations that have kept them in the space of this negative thought process. It is our time to reclaim who we are! As I say frequently in my own social media, “It is YOUR time!” Yes, it IS!

“I can’t live my life trying to please everyone else. I need to please myself.”—Stephanie

The new year of 2020 is about self-love and self-care. We need you to be the best version of yourself as we each step forward in this collective of women to shift and bring about even further goodness and change. Are you joining us? I can’t wait!

Stay tuned and step forward...


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